The Bachelorette

Standard

Tonight on TV a single, white woman will once again chose a guy to marry or something like that by giving him a rose.

Tonight in my head, I really don’t care.

(I stand corrected. The Bachelorette is Israeli. Its a change of pace. I am sorry for not having my facts straight).

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wellthatsjustgreat:

Discussion at the University of Maryland six months ago.

Designer: So what are you looking for in the new uniform design?

Athletic Director: Can you make something that incorporates the Maryland flag but in a way that makes it appear as if you have suffered some kind of awful brain injury that has severed your corpus callosum and rendered each hemisphere of your brain ignorant of what the other hemisphere is thinking and seeing?

Designer: Yes. Yes I can.

Ag

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wellthatsjustgreat:

thingsmusicalstaughtme:

Submitted by Youhavethegrim.

Yeah. Here’s what musicals taught me:

  • Women who can sing well but have exaggerated facial features that would appear distracting on a movie screen can find work if they can really, really overact.
  • Plays aren’t as important as musicals because you can’t make money off of a soundtrack. Also, no one buys a “Glengarry Glen Ross” collector cup.
  • If source material is too lame or shallow to support a ninety minute film or two hour play it is perfect for a three hour musical.
  • If a theatrical experience isn’t presented within a one square mile portion of New York City, it doesn’t count as real theater.
  • Musicals can make Spider-Man, gifted athleticism, and U2 all look totally lame. 
  • Bad lip syncing during a parade on Thanksgiving is apparently amazingly effective marketing.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to work on my Thanksgiving medley, “Well That’s Just Some Music To Drive Hits To My Two Sites And Online Store.”

Ag